In the next couple of months I plan on blogging about my struggle with food addiction, but before I focus on my current battle I want to take some time to celebrate the growth God has done in my character – not as a way to brag about me, but to glorify Him.
The single biggest area of growth that I’ve experienced over the last year has been awareness. That might not seem like much, but it’s a big deal for me. Can’t work on changing if I’m blinded to what needs changing.
This awareness of some of my weaknesses gives me opportunities to practice change. One thing that I became aware of recently was how I often wouldn’t give my beloved my full attention when talking. Multi-tasking and trying to get projects done meant that I frequently would only half hear what Robbie was saying.
I’ve known that I do this for a long time, but I wasn’t really aware of how that had hurt him recently. Now that I’m aware, I am doing a better job of catching myself and focusing on him when we talk.
That’s just one example. This increased sensitivity to the fact that I wound and hurt people and am insensitive is a sign of the Holy Spirit’s work within me.
Some of my older drama students will remember the days of consistently harsh director. (I am now inconsistently harsh. Still working on that.) my favorite saying of that era was “do I look like I care?”
Yeah. I was pretty harsh. I’m still harsh, but I’m better at recognizing and repenting quickly instead of years later. God has softened me, something my students and I are both thankful for.
As I look at the seemingly endless road of battling sin in my life, it’s encouraging to be able to step back and remember that God is faithful and is at work. The progress can be pretty slow, but it’s there. Praise God for his redemptive work.